Recently
I have been feeling a little bit down – kind of hard on myself.
In
helping my parents move, I came across some of my high school report cards.
Not
surprisingly the only subjects I liked were dance, cosmetology and French. I
always thought I did extremely well in these classes; I was surprised to see
barely passing marks.
The teachers’ responses were “Jennifer tries”.
I
got to thinking what else do I think I’m good at but I am not…
With
one thing leads another… Then I am putting myself down about my weight or the
bad acne I have…
Am
I good at my job? Should I really have had that chocolate bar? Or I should have
worked out while I was watching that TV show…
I
had to remind myself to love myself.
If
you want to have a beautiful outside, you need to have a beautiful inside.
- Looks Don't Define You
If
you truly want to love yourself, you must not allow the way you look to define your
personal value. It can’t be what dictates your worth to have joy, family or a
promotion at work.
The people who know and love you the most really couldn’t
care less about your weight, skin tone, or hairstyle.
When you do find joy, family or that job
promotion, it won’t be the dress or the shoes or the shade of your lipstick. It
will be the passion in your voice, or ability to write beautiful words, or
paint amazing paintings, or explore creatively.
Although
I am married now, I do have to remind myself that my husband didn’t just marry
me because of my looks, he married me because I am an honest, caring, goofy person.
- Let it Go
If
you are to redefine the love in your life, you must first attempt to reconcile
previous experiences of heartache.
We tend to carry around the tiny fragments
of failed relationships, folded up neatly in our pocket. We let them weigh us
down.
We’ve
all been hurt. We’ve all been let down. We’ve all had that someone who didn’t
message back, or stood us up on a date, or put our hearts through the blender.
We’ve all been left feeling exposed and vulnerable, our trust abused and our
egos bruised. You can’t resent these feelings, for that would be handing them
more power than they deserve. That would be handing them our futures.
We
need to forgive. We need to move on. We need to let go.
I
always felt like I had to learn from the experience. What did I learn from that person, or that
situation?
- Impress Yourself
You
are absolutely amazing, don’t treat yourself otherwise. You might need to
occasionally remind yourself, surprise yourself, woo yourself.
Write
a short story or poem. Draw or paint.
You might surprise yourself!
Even if you aren’t brilliant at it at least you
took the chance and tried.
Buy
your favorite tub of ice cream and when you know that you’ll need it most enjoy
it. Grab yourself that bouquet of flowers from the farmer’s market; enjoy their
color and beauty.
Take
an evening or weekend class - yoga
class, or learn to speak French, or play the acoustic guitar.
Something you like or have wanted to try.
Do
whatever makes you feel good.
- Don't Compare Yourself
Life’s
not a race. Love’s not a race. Stop competing.
Jane
what’s-her-name might be in a long-term relationship and accomplishes major
goals at work, while you’re still single and stuck in a minimum wage job.
She’s is probably
looking at your life and wishing she had the same level of independence and
freedom.
The grass is always greener.
Remember,
when you look at someone and think “I wish I was pretty like her”, someone is
thinking the same thing about you.
- Have some alone time
Whether,
you are single or in a relationship, I think it’s important to have that alone
time.
There’s
nothing quite as empowering as getting completely lost in something by
yourself.
Go to that romantic comedy you’ve been wanting to see.
Turn your
phone off. See the local attractions.
Walk everywhere. Ask strangers for
directions.
Try a cocktail you can’t pronounce.
Smile for no reason.
Let
yourself become totally disconnected from the world as you know it — and
realize that time moves on regardless, that you’re okay by yourself.
You
deserve someone who makes you feel beautiful, someone who makes you feel
special. You deserve to be someone’s first priority.
Regardless
of the support system you have in your life, that person always has to be YOU.
